Before we talk about invalidating trauma, let us talk a bit about what trauma is. The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) states that trauma is an event or circumstance that results in physical harm, emotional harm and/or life threatening harm that can negatively impact mental, physical, emotional health and social and spiritual well-being. (https://www.samhsa.gov/trauma-violence).
Should you want more information on the definition of trauma, types of trauma, impact of trauma and treatment of trauma, please visit https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/trauma.
Invalidating trauma is when we go about denying, rejecting, refuting, dismissing someone’s feelings. When we invalidate something that someone has experienced, we are sending the message that what they experienced is invalid, inaccurate and/or not acceptable. At times, we send the very same invalidating messages to ourselves.
Not only do humans invalidate the trauma that others have experienced, they also invalidate their own trauma that is based upon their personal experience and exposure. We then start to feel like we are “going crazy” thinking “did this really happen to me?” “Maybe it wasn’t really that bad,” is a common thought when one’s trauma has been repeatedly invalidated.
The truth is that no one on the planet knows your personal and individual experience or exposure to a particular trauma. Do not allow others to define your experience. Ignoring or denying the negative impact of trauma can lead to poor coping skills, inability to cope appropriately with emotions, strained relationships, depression, anxiety, and sadness.
Respect what your body, mind and spirit are telling you. A person knows what happened to them and how they are being impacted by that experience and exposure even if they did not realize that it was a traumatic event until later on.
Please read the articles below to discover what invalidating statements look like. Have you ever said or heard these invalidating statements?
If you or someone you know is impacted by the effects of trauma, it is important to know that help is available. Please seek help from a licensed professional.
Should you not have access to professional help, please access these agencies to assist you:
http://www.nami.org National Alliance on Mental Illness site includes resources by state.
988 Mental Health Crisis Hotline
https://psychcentral.com/blog/childhood-trauma-overcoming-the-hurt-of-invalidation#1
https://www.shondaland.com/live/body/a41055703/a-path-to-well-being-understand-and-face-trauma/
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